My usual modus operandi on my runs is to find something that piques my interest early on in the run and to look for items/observations to help the time pass, as it stops me focussing on niggles, aches, pains, breathing etc. A distraction strategy if you like. And for whatever reason, this morning I was remembering my Aunty Jen who when she babysat me used to let me watch either the snooker or Come Dancing on tv. These were the black and white tv days, so the snooker always had to be described clearly by the commentator, as all the balls, bar the cue and the black, were in shades of grey.
Today, in memory of my Aunty Jen, I did the snooker run as it would be nigh on impossible to come across ballroom dancers on the streets of Le Marche on a Monday morning. I made a slight variation on the snooker rules as I thought it unlikely I’d get 15 red cars, before being able to ‘pot’ the colours. But the scoring for my run is as follows:-
I score the requisite points if a car of the colour passes me (oncoming traffic only), but I must get one cue ball in white to be able to play. Bikes, mopeds, pedestrians don’t count, nor do stationary vehicles. Today is scorchio, and a Monday so I expected the roads to be quite quiet, and true enough, first off down Mill Lane – nada. Then my usual turn off into Lovers’ Lane, no-one there either on foot or bike, or car, or tractor or lorry. That’s 1km done, quite slowly, to preserve energy and no snooker balls to be seen.
Running down the hill that kills, and still not a thing, this could be a very low scoring snooker game, I turn onto the Slope of Hope and get overtaken by a white and red striped concrete lorry. I decide he counts as the cue ball, therefore from now on I’m in the points. After 2kms, I get my first colour – a green, faded Fiat Panda, followed in quick succession by a navy blue Golf. That’s 8 points bagged, but then I get a clutch of white cars (white, silver and black are the most common colours here, as can be seen from the car park pic). I’m up to 6 whites in a few minutes. At Km3, I get a rusty, battered red cinquecento (old style), that’s another 1 point.
Heading into Royston Vasey, I consider that pink, yellow and brown are likely to be the hardest colours to get. It’s no longer school time otherwise the yellow school buses would be a help. Through Royston Vasey, a Burgundy coloured Fiat Panda, and a golden Punto pass me – another 3 points in the bag. Out of Royston Vasey and a flurry of cars pass me. 2 greens – a LandRover and the local Comune’s road repair Apé. A primrose Fiat Panda passes – that is the sum total of yellows as it turns out. Then I get a bright metallic blue Punto, and three black cars in a row.
From here on in, I can’t actually recall the places where I got my colours as my colour counting challenge meant I had to re-recite the colours in order as the cars passed. I do know that at the fish shop village I still hadn’t scored any brown or pink vehicles (push bikes didn’t count). But the fish shop village was where I got my browns, 3 reds in succession in Bin Lane and the rest of the blacks. But absolutely no pink to be seen anywhere. I had my pootler pink lipstick on, my face was pink, my water belt is pink but then rounding the corner on Bin Lane I saw the pink vespa parked. That couldn’t count as it was already parked up – what a shame. I stopped the snooker count on the ‘all roads lead to Rome’ road, as it’s way too dangerous to do it, you need all your concentration there to stay alive.
Just over 10 kilometres run, my snooker score fell as follows:-
Yellow – 4 points
Green – 9 points
Brown – 12 points
Blue – 20 points
Pink – 0 points
Black – 49 points
Red – 5 points
That’s my maximum break of 99 points – not bad but a way to go for the maximum 147. Thanks Aunty Jen for the inspiration.
Is Vic There? – Department S
She’s Electric – Oasis
Tokyo Joe – Bryan Ferry
It’s Called A Heart – Depeche Mode
Sign Of The Times – Harry Styles
Jenny Was A Friend Of Mine – The Killers
Smile Like You Mean It – ditto
Just Can’t Get Enough – Depeche Mode
Rehab – Amy Winehouse
You Love Us – The Manics
Alison – Elvis Costello
Let’s Go Crazy – His Purple Highness
Runnin’ Down A Dream – Tom Petty
Disco 2000 – Pulp
Crazy In Love – Beyoncé
Night Fever – Bee Gees
The Reflex – Duran Duran
Girls and Boys – Blur
Average Pace 6:51
Elevation Gain 43 metres
Kms Done 1161.76
Kms to Run 856.24