things I hate about running:-
- The laundry – see pic above, my life seems to have shifted location to a dystopian nightmare of a laundromat, where my every waking moment is consumed by washing, doing, folding, putting away running kit. Six times a week people! I can say no more, as the washing machine has just beeped at me, telling me to put this morning’s running kit on the line.
- The trainer fug – there is no treatment known to man that can remove the pong of well-worn trainers. I have my own treatment which is to Febreze each pair after wearing and to alternate pairs, so the whiff isn’t too overpowering. I often collect my own little posse of flies after a long run, and I’m convinced it’s the trainer fug that is to blame for me looking like Pig Pen from Snoopy. I need a containment room akin to the concrete jacket put around Chernobyl, otherwise all my clothes whiff too.
- Little old nonnas driving ancient cinquecentos – to a woman they aim their cinqs at me. Even if the road is empty except for me, I can guarantee they will turn the steering wheel towards me. Do I have nonna magnetism perhaps? Are my running shorts some kind of homing device for them? I don’t know, but I do wish they’d stop driving directly towards me, it’s scary.
- The post run glow. Or in my case, the beacon of red, suffused with essence of sweat and a halo of unruly, untameable frizzy hair. At no point in or at the end of a run, do I look anything other than completely knackered. It doesn’t matter whether its 5k, 10k, or 15k – the end result is always the same, a shrieking banshee like mess. Oh to look faintly glowing, with the swooshy ponytail…. in your dreams JCR.
- The fact that it doesn’t matter how much I run, I don’t seem to be getting any better at it. My times have stayed more or less the same, in fact have worsened a bit. My stride length is too short really to be called a stride. And I really, really thought that after more or less 8 months of running 40+km a week, I’d start to find knocking these runs out to become a bit of a breeze. How wrong and deluded can one be? But I do have a running analysis session – a present from Mr JCR – to undertake when we return to London, so that may uncover the reason why.
Today’s run encapsulated some of these pet hates, the laundry – tick. The trainer fug – tick. The ancient nonna was conspicuous by her absence but in contrast I experienced, what for me, has been the unique occasion of the year. An Italian car stopped to let me cross a junction, even though strictly speaking it was his priority. I almost fainted – how utterly amazing, an Italian stallion stopped his car on the main road to let a red faced banshee run across his access point. I’m still in shock.
The post run glow, was its usual state, necessitating a swab down with half of the café’s paper towels, and I finished my run, with a slight hamstring twinge – maybe I need that analysis sooner rather than later.
But after all the pet hates, there is one undeniable truth, I can and did walk the 4km back up the Bitch of a Pitch (to our house which is approximately 230m above sea level), without hesitation or becoming short of breath and that wasn’t true just over a year ago. Result. Oh and I am developing a Kardashian Kulo, which could be my route to a fortune, I’m not sure on social media’s appetite for a geriatric Kardashian butt, I could photoshop the wrinkles out?
My Coo Ca Choo – Alvin Stardust
Devil Gate Drive – Suzi Quatro
Blockbuster – Sweet
Shang A Lang – Bay City Rollers
Band On the Run – Wings
Everybody Dance – Chic
See My Baby Jive – Wizzard
All The Young Dudes – Mott The Hoople
Roll Over Beethoven -ELO
Baker Street – Gerry Rafferty
So You Win Again – Hot Chocolate
Freeze-Frame – J Geils Band
Boogie Shoes – KC And The Sunshine Band
Walk On The Wild Side – Lou Reed
Lady Marmalade – Patti LaBelle
Boogie Oogie Oogie – A Taste Of Honey
Silver Lady – David Soul
I Love To Love – Tina Charles
Night Fever – Bee Gees
Amarillo – Tony Christie
Killer Queen – Queen
Summer Breeze – The Isley Brothers
Average Pace 7:14 (mins/km)
Elevation Gain 27 metres
Kms Done 1365.34
Kms to Go 652.66
(24 kms behind the August plan, but I have made up some of the migraine missing kms)