Mar 17 – The Loneliness of the Non-Distance Runner

 

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With thanks to Mr Sillitoe for the inspiration for the post’s title

A recap

2018, let’s run 2018km to raise £2018 for Alzheimer’s Research – done, tick well done

2019, let’s fix the frozen shoulder and gippy hip, with a view to being able to learn to box this year – aha, a work in progress. And then go back to normal running about 1200/1500kms in a year. Oh and hopefully manage a half marathon sometime during the year.

January – physio started, doctor’s health check done – a few small issues highlighted:-

  • Kidney issuette
  • High cholesterol
  • Shoulder still dodgy, but being fixed
  • Hip being fixed, however it is resisting treatment
  • Migraines a go -go

February – mmm, things aren’t getting any better:-

Kidney infection, necessitating antibiotics for a week

Gastric type flu, which 4 weeks later is still hanging around

Shoulder, now close to being mobile – yippee

Hip, IT Band, Glutes  – all still problematic

I did however, Marie Kondo my running kit drawer, so it looks professional, even if I don’t.

March – 

Flu continues

Shoulder within touching distance of a fix

Hip – being very stubborn and I am banned from running

Upside, we are due back in Italy soon and I have my physio plan.

Downside, my physio plan involves weird crab like manoeuvres, involving me squeezing my buttocks imagining I’m holding a £20 note between them. Having never squeezed a £20 note (or any other denomination or currency) between my buttocks, this does involve a severe look of concentration, coupled with the hope that I don’t really look like a constipated crab.

Now I didn’t know that there is a YouTube character called the Constipated Crab, so here for your delectation is the Constipated Crab Video link. Any similarity between me and said crab is purely physiotherapical (I know it’s not a word!)

 

The main reason for posting is that if I keep doing the Physio and exercises, and if I write about those instead, it’ll keep me on the straight and narrow.

Wish me luck on the latest part of the physio treatment plan. Tomorrow morning – we do the stork, followed by the crab thing, followed by squatting and leg lifts, with my assorted coloured elastic bands. Think primary school bondage, and you’re not far off my current exercising look. I have a fear that after having broken the 2k km in a year, that I could end up redoing C25K again. My fingers are crossed  that me and Mr Smooth don’t actually have to start dating again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

15 Feb – Strike A Pose…

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From geek.com, where more Shrek delights await. Parental Advisory: this site contains images not suitable for children, and I’m not sure they’re any better for adults.

Another day passes, and yet another day without a run (sigh). The upside is though is that Mr JCR and I are in Arnhem for a Winter Wonderland and Fairytale birthday party.

The downside is that one of the friends of our friends is threatening to turn up as a naked Shrek. Green and with dangly bits, it doesn’t bear thinking about, especially for an outdoor barbecue in February. In case your imagination doesn’t stretch that far, here is a pic, so you can enjoy the same nightmare I did last night.

To the more serious bit about running, it is now just on five weeks without a run, and in that time five sets of physio. The good news is the pain is improving, the bad is that it’s not improving anywhere near quickly enough. But I have exercises to do and they seem to help. I am giving myself a mental limit to the end of February to start back running in earnest.

My running limit is 2km per run (as advised by my Physio) I must not run again until the aching subsides – presently that’s been five or six days, most of the pain is centred around the IT band, and it’s being very stubborn in attempts to sort it out.

The exercise regime includes squats, lunges and a crab type thing with buttock squeezes – and when I am being pummelled by the Physio, I more or less have to adopt the Shrek position above.

If I don’t start running soon my buttocks will also resemble Shrek’s. That is my update – an update where nothing is happening. Although I have a feeling that if a naked Shrek does appear on Saturday night, I’ll soon find my running capability comes back very quickly.

More next week, when Mert, Victor and the unnamed lady physio, will be doing their very best to get me moving again.

 

 

 

 

1st Feb – Slush Puppying

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The Beast from the East has returned, hurrah, I had one of my best runs last year when he came to visit.

However, said Beast from the East, is a little smaller this time around. Not so much snow as a scattering of slush on the pavements.

Today is the day, I go for my rehab run – yes I am officially allowed back on the pavements of London.

Runderwear – ready

Socks – ready

Running Tights – ready

Base Layer – ready

Running Top – ready

Gloves – ready

Bobble Hat – ready

Spotify – ready (my new Blue Monday Remedy playlist)

Runner – ready

Out I venture and my warm up walk takes me to the delights of Silicon roundabout. Then I start the running to J Geils and Freeze-frame – what an appropriate tune for my first time out in 3 weeks. My hip and thigh are twingeing a bit, so I am as slow as a snail. Good job really as the pavements have a lovely mix of London Road detritus mixed in with the slush – think liquorice coloured rather than dayglo. It’s a bit slippy underfoot,  and as I can famously fall over a twig, I gingerly run to the fish shop – more or less a 2km run as the physio ordered.

Not much to report really, plenty of slush, a couple of mini-slides, and a few twinges but it was wonderful to get out again. Not entirely sure how much good or damage I may have done to my leg, but no doubt the Physio will tell me on Tuesday. Jancanrun has just done a run, it’s not big, long, fast or clever, but it is a run, and there’s about another 60 tracks on the Blue Monday playlist to get through, at this rate that’s about another 10 runs.

Playlist

Freeze-Frame – J Geils Band

Centrefold – J Geils Band

Too Drunk to F… – Dead Kennedys

Somebody Else’s Guy – Jocelyn Brown

Disco Inferno – The Trammps

Stats

Distance 2.34km

Time = over 15 minutes, I told you I was slow

Pace/Elevation – immaterial

 

 

29 Jan – JCR Is On The Road Again

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Strictly speaking, this is not exactly true, but the Physio has confirmed I can try a little run, no more than 25% of my usual distance and I must rest for 24 hours minimum afterwards.

This coupled with Mr JCR acting as a muscly stretching person on my unwilling legs and an introductory course of Pilates, is supposedly going to get me back to normal. Hurrah. (I’m trying to forget the squats instructions…)

As to the dodgy shoulder, that’s a longer game, Mert and Victor and Raffaella are going to continue to see me weekly for at least a couple of months to come. As I don’t run with my shoulder, that’s a little less of an issue, although the injury is more severe, but it is going to curtail any thoughts of boxing for a while.

A little ray of sunshine pierced through the injury gloom, and the blooming flowers in the park on the way home, made me feel quite optimistic.

From a Couch to 5K member, to a 2000km runner, I am now back to doing just 2kms, but it’s 2kms more than I’ve been able to do for almost four weeks now.

If the Beast from the East is returning for me, I’m ready and waiting – trainers are on standby.

 

 

 

7 Jan – Looking for Blue

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and finding only grey skies today. Second run of the year, just going where the legs took me.

London is slowly returning to its pre-Christmas normal. The fake German market huts have gone, the lights are down, but the tourists are still around and an awful lot of post-Christmas runners are skipping around the City.

I made my way through the City and towards the Strand, the pavement traffic was light and I was nicely light on my feet, turning south, I wanted to run by the river. Ooh it’s a bit windy and I am ‘joined’ by a running group. They are four and on my heels, but I have solo ninja power to aid me and I keep them at bay. But like wolves circling their prey, slowly, relentlessly they hunt me down and overtake in a swoosh near Tate Modern. I try to pick up the pace but have a slightly dodgy right hamstring, which having read up on Dr Google is another runner’s ailment beginning with ‘p’. I take a chance to have a breather and read up on this new ‘p’ ailment – it apparently can be due to overrunning (mmm I wonder how that happened), or lack of flexibility (okay hands up).

A bit of random stretching is in order, and I do have a right real pain in the bum – literally. Oh that’s another sign of this ‘p’ ailment. I decide to slow the pace and do a jogette back to base. The only light blue I saw was on the Tower Bridge railings, but my mood is not blue, it was a lovely run and an appointment has been made to see a physio on Thursday.

Playlist

First singles ever being tested.

Ride A White Swan – TRex

How Long – Ace

Living For The City – Stevie Wonder

Living Doll – Cliff Richard

Maggie May – Rod Stewart

Baby, Stop Crying – Bob Dylan

It’s Still Rock and Roll To Me – Billy Joel

Bedsitter – Soft Cell

As Long As You Love Me – Backstreet Boys

The Things We Do For Love – 10cc

Babe – Take That

I’m Not In Love – 10cc

Mississippi – Pussycat

mmmBop – Hanson

Take A Chance On Me – ABBA

Hello This is Joanie – Gary Brown

Changes – David Bowie

The Bump – Kenny

Killer Queen – Queen

Cool for Cats – Squeeze

Keep On Running – Spencer David Group

Life On Mars – David Bowie

Creeping Death – Metallica

Transmission – Joy Division

Hippy Hippy Shake – Swinging Blue Jeans

Take My Breath Away – Berlin

Stats

Distance 10.48km

Time 1:07:19

Average Pace 6:25

Elevation Gain 85 metres

Cumulative 16.5 kms (this is 16.5km more than I managed this time last year, so it’s not exactly bad news)

 

 

 

 

 

4 Jan – Thank You For Making 2018 The Best

The text on the slides may be small (no thanks to WordPress who have changed the system aargh), but the support from all of you has been immense, whether it was cash, encouragement, nagging, or any combination of these, you are the people who helped me make my challenge in 2018. As of today, we have £2460 for Alzheimer’s Research (£2700+ with tax relief) and Mr JCR and I will be adding in some cash to make it a nice round number.

This all will help to provide a cure for the horror that is Alzheimers and other dementia diseases. We snuck over the £2400 barrier thanks to donations from Paul and Rachel and my MCP’s.  Thank you all for being my friends, and in true fashion, I finish off talking about the challenge with a song – helpfully rewritten, by my dear running friend Gill (she who left home and hearth on Christmas Eve to run my final run!!)

🏃‍♀️

Thank you for being my friends

Travelled down the road and back again

Your hearts are true, you are givers of confidence

I’m not ashamed to say

Success is down to C25K

My hat is off, won’t you all stand up and take a bow

And if we threw a party

Invited everyone we knew

Well, you would see the biggest smile coming from me

And the only thing I’d say

🏃‍♀️

Thank you for being my friends 

Thank you for being my friends 

Thank you for being my friends 

Thank you for being my friends 

If it’s support you lack

I’ll be there for you, I’ll have your back

Whatever you need any time of the day or night

I’m not ashamed to say

I hope it always will stay this way

My hat is off, won’t you all stand up and take a bow

And when we all get older

With walking canes and hair of grey

Have no fear, we can give ourselves a cheer,

C25K is the way

🏃‍♀️

Thank you for being my friends (I want to thank you)

Wonderful women and men (I want to thank you)

On you my success depends (I want to thank you)

To you heartfelt thanks extends (I want to thank you)

Let me tell you your all my friends (I want to thank you)

Thank you for being my friends (I want to thank you)

Some ran with me at the end (I want to thank you)

Encouraged me round the bends

I’ve run over two thousand k

And raised some funds for ARUK

To those who gave generously

I raise a glass (or Yorkshire tea)

🏃‍♀️

Thank you for being my friends…

🏃‍♀️

Thank you for being my friends (I want to thank you)

I reached my target and then (I want to thank you)

I’ll rest until the weekend (I want to thank you)

I hope my toenails will mend

🏃‍♀️

Oh yes and today I went for a run – 6kms with a trout and a salmon… 2019 starts pretty much the same way as 2018!

28 Dec – Oops, I Did It Again

Running Forgetfulness

This title is the only thing Britney Spears and I have in common. I did say I’d have a two-week sabbatical from running, but the full-to-busting running kit drawer, seemed to whisper very time I passed it, and so I gave into the inevitable and went for a run.

Before I get complaints from the BBC viewers association or whomever, I did make sure that it couldn’t count towards my Alzheimer’s Challenge.

First off, I ran for 2kms to the doctors had my appointment and then ran home – just on 5kms logged but not in one run, so therefore ineligible for the challenge.

Then I had to go back to the doctors, so that was another 4kms banked. That’s 9kms run in a day and none of it counts towards the Alzheimer’s Challenge, but it did count towards the removal of chocolate and Christmas poundage.

Speaking of pounds – thanks to Alan P, who very kindly donated to my cause. Thanks Alan.

Playlist

I Am Henery The Eighth I Am – Herman’s Hermits

Bela Lugosi’s Dead – Bauhaus

Flash – Queen

Doctorin’ The Tardis – The Flag

I Just Shot John Lennon – The Cranberries

Motorhead – Hawkwind

Angie – Rolling Stones

Delilah – Tom Jones

Elvis Ain’t Dead – Scouting For Girls

Clair – Gilbert O’Sullivan

Genghis Khan – Iron Maiden

Maid Of Orleans – OMD

Oh Yoko – John Lennon

Stan – Eminem and Dido

Stats

Distance 9.35kms

Calories 675 calories supposedly – that equals just over 100grams of chocolate. Just a pity I’ve eaten a lot more than 100g of chocolate!