8 January – Introducing JanCanRun’s Runners’ Rules 1-10

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The esteemed Mr JCR, he who blogs at Colincanride.com, introduced me to the concept of the velominati, a group of folk who manage the cycling community’s rules of engagement. Absolutely nothing to do with rules of the road, or Highway Codes. Simply, this is the definitive guide to what is and isn’t acceptable to fellow cyclists when cycling.

It is an utterly subjective view, some of it quite funny and I attach the link for those interested. There are 95 rules as of today.

http://www.velominati.com/the-rules/

There are a set of published Runner’s Rules – but you have to pay to get those, and so mine are free. And in recognition of the fact that it is far easier to navigate when you know your way around, I will create the rules, ask for help on more rules and then categorise them. Oh btw, the Editor’s judgement is final and no debate will be entered into.

So my starters on the general rules are with a big thanks to the velominati for the first three :-

Rule 1 – Obey The JCR Runners’ Rules (now abbreviated to JCRRR)

Self explanatory.

Rule 2 – Lead By Example

It is unethical for someone who knows the JCRRR, to knowingly and wittingly aid an unknowing runner in breaching the JCRRR

Rule 3 – Help The Unknowing

No matter how valid your reason is for breaching the JCRRR (in your head), it is never good enough.

Rule 4 – It Is All About Running

The JCRRR does not transfer to biathlons, triathlons, Iron Men, Women, walkers, dog walkers (dog runners are permitted under the Labrador Convention*), or pram walkers (pram runners are permitted under the Jo Pavey** rule)

Rule 5 – Weather is Never An Excuse

Enough said, although if you are running on an oil rig in the Atlantic or other ocean, gale warnings are an acceptable reason not to run. If you still run, then Respect is due.

Rule 6 – Run With Your Mind and Your Legs Will Follow

Your mind can and will let you down when running. This is perfectly normal. What is not normal is to stop running merely seconds into a run because ‘I don’t feel like it’. Run the run in your head, and your legs will do the rest.

Rule 7 – Any Run Is Better Than No Run

It’s true.

Rule 8 – Runners’ Kit

There is no limit to the amount of kit needed to run, the only limit is your imagination or wallet, or both.

Rule 9 – Runners’ MoJo

May occasionally go AWOL, can be restored by putting on trainers and running

Rule 10 – Definition of a Runner

A Runner is someone who runs. Distance does not a runner make (thanks Yoda). A 100m Runner is a Runner, an Ultra Runner is a Runner. And so is everyone inbetween. Snail Runners are definitely runners. Fast walkers aren’t runners.pexels-photo-320956.jpeg

*The Labrador Convention

Canine assisted running is a very valuable training tool, therefore all dogs being run by their runner owners, or runners being run by their dogs, count as runners.

**Jo Pavey Rule

Mums who Run count or Runners who Mum count. As per Jo Pavey’s Book – This Mum Runs.

What rules do you think should follow these? I have thought of rules on

Food and Nutrition

Running Kit

Etiquette When Running

Training

Music

Racing

parkruns

Injury Management

Heroes

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t….

 

run a Marathon. So goes the latest Map My Run advice and there are three reasons, which can be found and are discussed fully here

In summary though, they are:-

  1. You’re not ready
  2. You can’t devote enough time to train
  3. You need more race practice

As I have no intention of running a marathon unlike my super fit friend J, (who was in fact an iron woman, before the term was ever coined), I thought I would adapt this advice for a more normal likelihood in the JCR household.

So, here are my three reasons for not running with a Marathon (or Snickers bar if you’re American or if you can’t remember that Snickers used to be called Marathons in the good old days!)

  • You’re not ready –

this is because you have forgotten to buy the Marathon/Snickers bars in the first place. Next time, be prepared and buy a family pack, that should do a whole week of running.

  • You can’t devote enough time to train –

running with chocolate requires dedication, first of all you need to practice the unwrapping whilst running. Secondly, you can’t run with chocolate on hot days, it’s just plain nasty. Smudged chocolate on your hands could get you arrested for indecent running. If your need to run with chocolate occurs in the summer months, you are unlikely to have sufficiently cool enough days to practice. Unless you live in the UK of course.

  • You need more race practice –

in the JCR household, first in the cupboard gets first dibs at the chocolate. Many practice sprints help your access to the goodies, this is technically called ‘interval training’. As any seasoned runner knows, interval training is a crucial tool to help with Marathon running.

And if these hints have helped, you may like a ‘sweetie’ inspired playlist on Spotify:-

Chocolate Girl – Deacon Blue

So You Win Again – Hot Chocolate

Pour Some Sugar On Me – Def Leppard

Push The Button – Sugababes

Strawberry Fields Forever – The Beatles

Raspberry Beret – Prince

Girl From Mars – Ash

Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This – Eurythmics

Sad Sweet Dreamer – Sweet Sensation

I Can’t Help Myself (Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch) – Four Tops

Boogie Oogie Oogie – A Taste Of Honey

Flake – Jack Johnson

Cake By The Ocean – DNCE

I’m The Fat Man – King Pleasure and The Biscuit Boys

Cream – Prince

Marathon – Junkie XL

Salt Peanuts – Charlie Parker and Dizzy Gillespie

Ice Cream Man – Blur

I Want Candy – Bow Wow Wow

You Got The Love – The Source and Candi Staton