16 Nov – Mojo Safari

 

Today I went mojo hunting for my running mate who has lost hers. I didn’t find it in Islington yesterday, but I’m not sure the fish shop was ever a likely location.  This morning however, the stars were aligned, I was wombling my way towards Trafalgar Square and running along Fleet Street, when I saw Shoe Lane – if ever there was a place for a running mojo to be hiding, I am guessing it could be here. And then of course I was actually on Fleet Street – another hint perhaps as to the whereabouts of the missing mojo.

I continued on to the Strand, where even though it was morning the Christmas lights were twinkling away merrily. This particular mojo is purple I believe and likes sparkly things so of course I had to stay with it and I was only about 3.5kms into my run.

I was convinced the mojo may have visited Trafalgar Square, thinking that a bit of Nelson’s courage may have rubbed off and she would have decided to go back to Yorkshire. Despite some impressive lions, Nelson himself, there was a Yoda, a man sitting on a spade and ‘Death’ with his scythe – the last three were hardly good luck portents, and frankly pretty rubbish frozen statues. No sign of a mojo here, we need something a little more in keeping.

And so it was, I ended up in Covent Garden, a humungous Christmas tree outside, twinkly lights on the inside and the most glorious mistletoe and baubles hanging from the ceiling. This definitely felt like the place a mojo would visit, then I saw some mojo confetti lying around. She’d left a trail obviously. Without further ado I picked up some of the confetti and sent it back to Yorkshire, because I think the mojo might be missing it.

The street artist outside Covent Garden was telling everyone they were having a good time and I was. I enjoy looking for mojos, even though when mine goes awol, it seems a lot harder to find.

Dear running mate, when your parcel of mojo dust arrives, I am sure your mojo won’t be that far behind.

Playlist

The numbers playlist

Lucky Number – Lena Lovich

5705 – City Boy

One Day Like This – Elbow

One More Time – Daft Punk

Five Years – David Bowie

She Will Be Loved – Maroon 5

Nine To Five – Sheena Easton

Perfect 10 – The Beautiful South

10 Lovers – The Black Keys

Swords Of A Thousand Men – Tenpole Tudor

People in Love – 10cc

The Eleven Rap – Dark Punk

21 Seconds – So Solid Crew

Thirteen Sad Farewells – Stu Larsson

Fourteen Rivers Fourteen Floods – Beck

Fifteen – Taylor Swift

Edge of Seventeen (twice) – Stevie Nicks

19 – Paul Hardcastle

21 Guns – Green Day

I’m Gonna Be 500 Miles – The Proclaimers

When I’m 64 – The Beatles

Disco 2000 – Pulp

80s Joint – Kelis

Love Shack – B52s

96 Tears – ? And The Mysterons

Stats

Distance 10.01km

Time 1:15:30

Average Pace 7:32

Elevation Gain 53 metres

Mojo – dust found and sent back home

Alzheimer’s Challenge

Kms Run 1855.26

Kms To Run 162.74

15 Nov – Be Careful What You Wish For…

dandelion macro photography
I can’t blame the dandelions…

Or in my case, what you wrote down one day last year. I had been wondering when I’d decided to do my Alzheimer’s Challenge – I checked out the blog for the first mention – thinking I’d committed to it sometime in November last year.  The reason for checking -well I couldn’t work out why I hadn’t created a plan nor a training regime prior to starting in January, and now I realise why.

It was actually December 14th when I first wrote about my wish to run virtual races throughout the year, to raise some money for research.   This was Plan (a) –  Plan (a) was quickly ditched when I couldn’t find any races to sign up for. Plan (b)  – the running down dementia challenge; run 100km and raise £100, which as I was running about 80kms a month anyway didn’t seem that much of a stretch. The hunt was on for a Plan (c).

A few more days of investigation passed and still no joy, Christmas came and went and it was in that time we call ‘Twixtmas’, that I committed on Plan (c)  to ‘run the year’ , The    slight issue is I’ve just re-read what I wrote back then and I actually committed to  ‘run 2018km as a minimum’.

Oh holy cow Batman – minimum. “Friends, Romans and Countrymen lend me your ears and how about we make a deal?” JCR types with fingers crossed tightly, which does make it hard to type, hoping that you will all support me in my final spurt.

The  ‘m’ word does sound a little emotive as though 2018kms in a year is a lazy-arse effort, and to be honest I’m pooped just thinking about those kms again. Here’s my proposal how about for my last last run of the year, I run 2.018 kms to a pub?

Then I will have run 2020.018kms, and get a gin and tonic or similar for my troubles. Or is this way too easy and you think I should suck up a longer run?

Answers on a postcard or if you’re suggesting something horrid like a marathon, can you please send a geographically challenged carrier pigeon instead. Btw – out again today and another 5.8 kms banked for the challenge.

Big thanks to our friend in London, B, who kindly sponsored me over the weekend. Another boost to the old confidence and knackered legs.

And a big hug to my running mate MummyCav who has lost her mo jo at the mo. I did run to the local fish shop to try and find it, but can confirm it wasn’t there, so it must be lurking in Yorkshire.

Playlist

What else but the MummyCav mix:-

Single Ladies – Beyoncé

Dear Prudence – Siouxsie and The Banshees

Sherry – Frankie Valli and The Four Seasons

Alison – Elvis Costello

Kayleigh – Marillion

Maggie May – Rod Stewart

Poison Ivy – The Lambrettas

Respect – Aretha

Ophelia – The Band

Queen Of Clubs – KC And The Sunshine Band

Roxanne – The Police

Uma Thurman – Fall Out Boy

Zoe Jane – Staind

 

Stats

Distance 5.80km

Time 40:33

Average Pace 6:57

Elevation Gain 23 metres

Alzheimer’s Challenge

Kms Run 1845.25

Kms To Run 172.75

13 Nov – Ju-Junopoly

This run is dedicated to my running mentor Ju-Ju, who has unfortunately got somewhat crocked with a very serious asthma attack. Along with fellow runners from the C25K crew, we are dedicating our runs to her this week.

Ju-Ju and I share three things :-

  • Nice running kit, although I still envy her gold ‘lamé’ type shorts
  • Lipstick for running, fave colours are runner’s ruby, pootler’s pink, and flaming flamenco
  • Run the Year challenges – slight difference, Ju-ju has achieved it, whereas I am still in course

I decided to do 12km today if I could, and took the scenic route up west.

As this was Ju-junopoly running, I decided just to focus on the ‘posher’ parts of town, so she could enjoy the views virtually. And I got:-

Trafalgar Square – with a snoozy lion, to the tune of The Lion Sleeps Tonight

Fleet Street – ye olde London pub – which I am guessing is probably not that ‘ye olde’

Strand – passing the Queen’s Bankers – Coutts

Pall Mall – The Institute of Directors

Turning around in St James’s Park, I passed the Canadian War Memorial, getting a spruce up from one of the park wardens, with the Autumn falling leaves obliterating the carved leaves in the memorial.

An absolutely fabulous run out, the 12kms passed quite quickly. I felt as though I was gliding – it must be Ju-Ju passing on her panthering method through the power of mindwaves. I was also testing out my new ‘Best Covers Ever’ playlist, when entering St James’s Park to ‘Nothing Compares 2 U’ that was a moment in itself, as the sun was shining, people were smiling and it was an utterly glorious London day.

Playlist

Nothing Compares 2 U – Sinead O’ Connor

Kiss – Art of Noise and Tom Jones

Valerie – Mark Ronson and Amy Winehouse

Back To Black – Amy Winehouse

Tainted Love – Soft Cell

Girls Just Want To Have Fun – Cyndi Lauper

Hurt – Johnny Cash

I Fought The Law – The Clash

Delilah – Tom Jones

Blue Suede Shoes – Elvis Presley

Stand and Deliver – No Doubt

911 Is a Joke – Duran Duran

The Lion Sleeps Tonight – Tight Fit

Ever Fallen In Love – Fine Young Cannibals

China Girl – David Bowie

I Only Want To Be with You – The Tourists

You Can’t Hurry Love – Phil Collins

Hallelujah – Alexandra Burke

All Along The Watchtower – Jimi Hendrix

Respect – Aretha Franklin

Sweet Dreams – Marilyn Manson

Whiskey In the Jar – Thin Lizzy

Twist and Shout – The Beatles

I Second That Emotion – Japan

Faith – Limp Bizkit

Stats

Distance 12.29km

Time 1:22:07

Average Pace 6:41

Elevation Gain 54 metres

Alzheimer’s Challenge

Kms Run 1827.37

Kms to Do 190.63 (fewer than 200km now!)

9 Nov – To market, to market

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To market, to market to buy a fat pig;
Home again, home again, jiggety-jig.
To market, to market, to buy a fat hog;
Home again, home again, jiggety-jog.

To market, to market, to buy a plum cake;
Home again, home again, market is late.
To market, to market, to buy a plum bun;
Home again, home again, market is done.

To market, to market, a gallop a trot,
To buy some meat to put in the pot;
Three pence a quarter, a groat a side,
If it hadn’t been killed it must have died.

This is an old nursery rhyme, and today I ran from home (on my rest day!!!!) to Borough Market, because yesterday I screwed up on my maths and didn’t quite make the numbers – aka Stupid Tart Syndrome. I neither galloped nor trotted nor jigged, but I did buy a fat pig, I bought two gorgeous, lovely sausage rolls from The Ginger Pig butchers in Borough. Horrendously priced, but a fab treat for later.

Couldn’t find a  plum cake nor bun, but  I did have a pain au raisin with my coffee – dead posh us Southerners.

Didn’t buy any meat for the pot either, but did get some lush mushroom pate and sourdough bread – see I am totally posh, despite my Northern upbringing.

Yesterday I couldn’t count, but today Map My Run lady decided to be stroppy, and she thought she’d count the time I was running, but not give me any credit for the distance. She did this twice…, so I had to guesstimate the metres missed…. Bah humbug

When MMR lady deigned to work properly I found I was running speedily and my little posh legs were motoring quite nicely. From a busy Aldersgate I bombed towards St Pauls dodging the morning commuters. Today I was most definitely a running ninja, I slipstreamed and overtook loads of people in and around the City. I realise that none of them knew they were in a race, nor had any of them dressed for it, but victory is sweet even when you’ve overtaken a lady wearing stiletto heels and carrying a briefcase/backpack thing – a briefpack maybe?

I made my way across the Thames and hit South Bank, the barriers to speed arrived thick and fast, lots and lost of people and lot and lots of tourists too. Commuters are fine when I’m running through the City – they know the rules. Move fast or stand aside, tourists however don’t know the rules at all. They have that happy meandering look on their faces, they stop and take unexpected photos (in fairness totally expected near the Golden Hind replica) and they have conversations in weird places – i.e. right in front of me/my running route.

You have to have lightning reactions or sharp elbows to work your way through a barricade of tourists (my new collective noun). Today my reactions were sharp, so my elbows didn’t need to be. A nice quick (for me) run out, getting me over the 1800km mark – next target getting over the 1818km mark, so I will have fewer than 200kms to run

Finally many thanks to Mike of Mr JCR’s London cycling club who sponsored me yesterday for my challenge. Utterly unexpected and very lovely.

Playlist

(iTunes also played up and stopped once or twice)

Tears You Can’t Hide – Madness

Suspect Device (twice) – Stiff Little Fingers

I Don’t Know (twice) – The Blues Brothers

Runnin’ Down A Dream – Tom Petty

Just Another Nervous Wreck – Supertramp

Rockferry – Duffy

One Step Beyond – Madness

Stats

Distance 6.08km

Time 37:21

Average Pace 6:08 (ninja like)

Elevation Gain 28 metres

Alzheimer’s Challenge

Kms Run 1805.87

Kms To Run 212.13

 

 

 

 

8 Nov- So close, but yet so far

mind-the-gap-882368_1920

Nice morning, sun, blue skies, warmish, what could possibly go wrong?

My maths that’s what…

I calculated I needed to do 8.2km, to get me over the 1800km mark

I was wrong  – it was 8.8km.

Guess which plonker finished her run 0.21km too soon, in the mistaken thought that she’d already passed her target?

Yup that’s JCRBCC – JanCanRunButCan’tCount

By not minding the gap, I missed my target, so guess who is going for a short run on her rest day tomorrow?

Nuff said.

Big big thanks again to P and T for their sponsorships – am still grinning despite being an idiot today!

Playlist

Transport focussed – which is apt considering my distance issues…

Cars – Gary Numan

Sailing On The Seven Seas – OMD

Driving In My Car, Night Boat To Cairo – Madness

Surfin’ USA – The Beach Boys

Hey Soul Sister – Train

Moped Eyes – Super Furry Animals

Riders On The Storm – The Doors

Groovy Train – The Farm

The Passenger – Iggy Pop

Walk This Way – Aerosmith

Don’t Pay The Ferryman – Chris De Burgh

Ocean Drive – Lighthouse Family

Ship of Fools – Erasure

Airport – The Motors

Motor Bikin’ Chris Spedding

Little Red Corvette – His Purple Highness

Mustang Sally – Wilson Pickett

Last Train to Clarksville – The Monkees

Stats

Distance  8.59km – I could weep

Time 58:43

Average Pace 6:49

Elevation Gain 40metres

Alzheimer’s Challenge

Kms Run 1799.79 (tomorrow I will get over 1800)

Kms to Run 218.21

 

 

 

 

 

7 Nov – Myth-busting

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I have an Italian life and running, I have a London life and running.  Let’s look at the stereotypes:-

Italy

Weather – gorgeous, sunny and blue skies

People – gorgeous, friendly and chatty

Food – gorgeous, but always Italian

Wine – gorgeous, but always Italian

Views – gorgeous

Running – why wouldn’t it be gorgeous?

London

Weather  – so-so and grey skies

People – standoffish and keep themselves to themselves

Food – eclectic, not always gorgeous

Wine – lots of choice, but always expensive

Views – interesting and some are gorgeous

Running – not bad if you don’t mind people and pollution

Picture the scene, Hampstead Royal Free Hospital, the Physiotherapy Waiting Room. Usually chock full of people with replacement hips, knees, plaster casts etc., today there are two of us, neither sporting anything remotely suggesting a crocked leg.

I am wearing my running kit, to run home post appointment, the other lady is wearing Adidas capris and trainers. Not a word is spoken. After 15 minutes of silence, I am boiling hot, the sweat is not so much a trickle, but more of a torrent. I am 58, this is my new normal.

Suddenly the 20something lady stands up and turns and says ‘Is it me or is it very hot in here, I’m having a hot flush’. At which point I burst out laughing, and replied that was exactly how I was feeling too. She prowled around the waiting room to find the culprit, a hot air ventilation system that seemingly had not long kicked into life. That coupled with the NHS wipe clean vinyl chairs had combined as a human microwave. I am tanned from a summer in Italy, but was sporting a very flushed face and a totally soggy bod. She was a typical ‘English rose’ complexion, and her face had changed from a porcelain like ivory, to a pork sausage pink. She then went onto say she hadn’t been that hot since the last time she was in a sauna. Then her mum came into the room from Physio ‘Gosh it’s very hot in here’. Cue more laughing.

That’s the Londoner stereotype put happily to one side, would my run give me the chance to challenge the others? Well, today no. As you can see the skies were grey and the view of Camden Lock not at its prettiest. That left me with food, wine and running to myth-bust. I can’t eat or drink on the run, so those myths will have to stand for another day. But the running…mmm.

First off, Map My Run lady had a strop, she started off okay and then deserted me – and recorded my time but not the distance. evidently she was in stereotype Londoner mode. Luckily, I know the run and was able to add in the missing kms later. A nice womble down from Hampstead and I was feeling relaxed and comfortable. Through Camden, well not quite so relaxed mainly because of people traffic – but it was lunchtime so entirely to be expected. The crowds disappeared at Mornington Crescent and I made my way towards Euston. At this point the rain started and folk were darting everywhere to avoid getting splashed. That necessitated some ninja manoeuvres on my part, which weren’t all entirely successful.

I made myself semi-invisible on the pavements (by putting my running cap on), I headed towards Kings Cross. Big mistake – load and loads of people, very little room on the pavement and even less on the A40 for the traffic. The stench of air pollution was very strong. Having been in Italy and Holland recently, where the congestion is much less this was really quite noticeable. By now though I was nicely warmed up, if a bit steamy and I trotted up towards Angel. A dart across to the fish shop, loading up lunch and dinner in my kangaroo pouch, and I was off.

Back towards home now, only about 2km to do, but dampening down very mobile fish in your pouch, isn’t conducive to a good running style. Frankly, nor is popping into a supermarket to buy more stuff, then running with one hand on the fish pouch and the other suspending a shopping bag.

The stereotype of weather and views prevailed today, but a return run from a hospital is never likely to take you to the most salubrious parts of town, nor take you away from people and pollution. Tomorrow gives me a fresh opportunity to take in better weather and hopefully better views.

Oh and a big shout out to friends P (Holland) and T (UK) for their sponsorships. My total is moving up quite nicely.

Playlist

60s Specials

Stand By Me – Ben E King

Let’s Dance – Chris Montez

Bad Moon Rising – Credence Clearwater Revival

Surfin’ USA – The Beach Boys

You Never Can Tell – Chuck Berry

The Israelites – Desmond Dekker

Soul Man – Sam & Dave

I Only Want To Be With You – Dusty

Rescue Me – Fontella Bass

I’m Into Something Good – Herman’s Hermits

California Dreamin’ – Mamas and Papas

Feeling Good – Nina Simone

Jumping Jack Flash – The Rolling Stones

Pretty Woman – Roy Orbison

Gimme Some Loving – Spencer Davis Group

Do You Love Me – The Contours

You Really Got me – The Kinks

Papa Was A Rollin’ Stone – The  Temptations

 

Stats

Distance 8.27km

Time 52:58

Average Pace 6:24

Elevation Gain 35 metres

Alzheimer’s Challenge

Kms Done 1791.2

Kms to Run 226.8

 

 

6 Nov – Fame, Fortune and Friends

 

Today, I went out for a rehab run, after yesterday’s return journey home from friends J and G in Arnhem. A warmish, grey day in London was beckoning me to return to the streets. 6 or 7km was the plan, as tomorrow I have a long run planned. I was pounding the streets,  and Mr JCR had another plan; to go shopping and buy copies of the December’s issue of Runner’s World so I could read my article about the 2018 challenge. The above pics are courtesy of his endeavours.

Well this is it, fame has finally come my way… Krappy Kardashian has made her mark in the world of running. Truth to say I am chuffed to bits at being featured and some my friends on Health Unlocked C25K Forum, very kindly donated to the cause as a result of seeing the article and recognising me. One lady even did a post asking everyone how they could help me raise money.

I can’t tell you how honoured that makes me feel, despite feeling slightly embarrassed at standing and doing fake running in Trafalgar Square was worth every shivering blush because of the response of all my running and non-running friends. Sorry if anybody thought it was a genuine ‘running’ picture – it was totally staged – I did do the running, but it was on command and not on one of my usual runs. I did run back home though…

That’s fame dispensed with, now onto fortune. My run was nice and fairly speedy for me, I found myself in Covent Garden, where I heard a cacophony of singing, that sounded football-fan like, but not a song I recognised. It was a horde of PSV Eindhoven fans, who were in fine voice, but also in fine beer. Using my best Dutch (please don’t giggle J & G) I said thank you as I made my way through them. When they heard me speaking Dutch I got offered a free beer, but respectfully declined as I was on a run. My fortunes were obviously looking up, it’s not often you get offered a free drink (although I don’t actually drink beer) on a run.

So happy was I that I forgot to reset my app and it missed chunk of my run. I made my way back to Holborn and the Inns of Court, where a lady said ‘well done’ when I ran past. I was feeling quite chipper and made my way home. 8kms done, and a reasonable time, although I can’t really be sure as I hadn’t used my technology correctly, but the distance if anything is understated.

I got home to see two copies of the magazine waiting for me and Mr JCR with a grin on his face, despite a sore back he’d gone out and bought the mag, so I could see the article for myself. He then did a mega post on Facebook and a very generous friend made a donation, bringing the fundraising up to £1400 or thereabouts. What can you say about friends, other than they always stand up to be counted. I’ve counted on you all for moral and of course financial support for this challenge. Thanks a lot, from a very happy, smiley, Krappy Kardashian. p.s. in the magazine the guy above me was running across Africa – over 2400 miles. Do I feel another challenge coming on???

Playlist

To Be Young Gifted and Black – Bob and Marcia

Liquidator – Harry J Allstars

Ghost Town, Gangsters, Too Much Too Young – The Specials

It Mek, 007 – Desmond Dekker  and The Aces

54-56 Was My Number – Toots and The Maytals

Rudi Got Married – Laurel Aitken

One Step Beyond – Prince Buster

The Tide Is High – Blondie

On My Radio, Back To Black- The Selector

Can’t Get Used to Losing You, Hand Off She’s Mine – The Beat

Walking In the Sunshine, Lip Up Fatty – Bad Manners

King Of Kings – Jimmy Cliff

Uptown Top Ranking – Althea and Donna

Stats

Distance 8.02km

Time 47:03 (this is understated due to tech cock up)

Average Pace 5:52 ( I so wish!!!)

Elevation Gain 37 metres

Alzheimer’s Challenge

Kms Done 1782.93

Kms to Run 235.07

 

 

 

 

 

4 Nov – Slip Slidin’ Away

 

These words are kindly borrowed from Mr Paul Simon. The first verse actually goes:-

Slip slidin’ away
Slip slidin’ away
You know the nearer your destination
The more you’re slip slidin’ away

And that is what is happening to me, – I am getting ever closer to running the year, but the run pace is eluding me. I think too much effort and not enough focussed training, before I started this challenge is now probably starting to bite. I find I can’t run fast even if I want to. For sure, unless you are an elite athlete, there’s a trade off between speed and distance. I’m not beating myself up about it, just observing I can’t have both.

With that in mind I set out this morning, having looked at the weather forecast which said Arnhem was at 1 degree – can’t be true I thought, then I saw the frost – aha looks like the forecast was accurate after all…  I set out on tarmac trails today, having in mind to run to Osterbeek which is about 5kms away, on a slower pace. However the famous JCR satnav kicked in and I was actually running in the opposite direction. I decided therefore to do a run I’d enjoyed last year, which was to go to the Arnhem War Memorial and Cemetery. I wrote about this last year – the Brits are popular in this area because of Operation Market Garden, and the cemetery is in lovely tranquil spot and makes me stop and think.

My trail today was uppy and downy, as was my pace. I was passed and accompanied by many a runner today, all of us in hats and gloves and long running tights. For my first 2km I ran towards the Burgher’s Zoo, where already folk were queuing to get in. I took my photo of the rather cute rhino and continued on. It was at this point I realised my JCR satnav was awry, and I made my way back from whence I came.

By now the sun was a little stronger and the frost was melting, as was my resolve to do 10km. The gremlins had made their way onto my shoulder and a 5km run out seemed tempting, not least because of the thought of an excellent breakfast back at J &G’s.

Nonetheless I set my steelometer to a higher setting than wimp, and continued on my way. So many people out and about on a very cold Autumn morning, some on bikes – the classic Dutch shopping types, then I got passed by at least two groups of MAMIL racers, but very respectful.

At the memorial park and cemetery, a number of folk had started to assemble and were looking at the graves. Somehow it didn’t seem quite right to be there in my dayglo hat and running gear, so I maintained a respectful distance. Then my fruit based technology started giving me a minor heart attack, saying it only had 13% battery left. A frantic closing down of apps ensued and I retraced my steps back home.

At Restaurant Trix my eyes were playing tricks on me, I thought I saw my friend J running towards me, but no, just another tall lady in dayglo.

My run was done, and just a touch over 11km. Slow, but sure, so I may be slip slidin’ away from speed, but I’m slipping inexorably to that target.

Playlist

Famous names list

Michael Caine – Madness

There’s A Guy Works Down the Chip Shop Swears He’s Elvis – Kirsty MacColl

Bette Davis Eyes – Kim Carnes

Geronimo – Sheppard

Grace Kelly – Mika

Joan of Arc (Maid Of Orleans) – OMD

Just Like Jesse James – Cher

Free Nelson Mandela – Soweto Singers

Clint Eastwood – Gorillaz

Prince Charming – Adam And The Ant

Bruce Lee – Robbie Williams

Andy Warhol – David Bowie

Black Man Ray – China Crisis

Electric Barbarella – Duran Duran

Barbie Girl – Aqua

Walks Like Rihanna – The Wanted

Moves Like Jagger – Maroon 5

Wood Beez (Pray Like Aretha Franklin) – Scritti Politti

Axel F – Harold Faltermeyer

Jackie Wilson Said – Dexy’s Midnight Runners

Frank Sinatra – Cake

The Ballad of Tom Jones – Space and Cerys Matthews

Michaela Strachan – Scouting For Girls

Marilyn Monroe – Pharrell

Al Capone – Prince Buster

Victoria – The Kinks

Stats

Distance 11.69km

Time 1:31:25

Average Pace 7:49

Elevation Gain 96 metres

Alzheimer’s Challenge

Kms Run 1774.91

Kms To Run 243.09

 

 

 

24 Oct – 300 to go, 300 ago

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Yesterday’s rest day saw us bottle our green gold and we now have lots of extra virgin olive oil. Today’s non-rest day sees me running my planned 9km and then helping to take down two cherry trees.

Today’s prime target is to get over the 1718 km mark, leaving me fewer than 300 to go. I had a boost first thing when one of my fellow C25Kers slinkimalinki also sponsored my Alzheimer’s Challenge. With that lovely gesture at front of mind, I got out for my run.

I realised when I was out that to go over the 1718 mark leaves me with 300 kms to do, and my thoughts turned to the year 1718 – 300 years ago. I wondered what, if anything, happened on the day I hit 1718.

And the answer is not a lot; now in fairness recording of history then wasn’t in digital records, so I limited myself to a Dr Google search when I got back

Stede Bonnet, the famous English pirate (I’d never heard of him either) escaped from prison having being found guilty of piracy and sentenced to death. He was known as the gentleman pirate, having decided piracy was better paid than being a landowner. As I’ve already said olive oil farming isn’t likely to make you a packet of cash either, so maybe I should become a modern pirate. Jancanrob.com, a new website coming to you shortly… 🙂

My run took me through a well worn path as I knew exactly which route to take to make sure I met my target kms. Mill Lane, Lovers’ Lane, the Hill that Kills, The Bendy Scary Road. And to be honest it was a quiet run, except for a volley of shot gun fire – it is hunting season here and I saw one of the hunters who seemed to be empty handed. He saw me at  my 4km mark and said ‘Quante fatica’ or How Hard? Now in fairness, at this point I wasn’t exactly tonking it, but I did feel perfectly fine – maybe my face told a different story?

At 6kms I saw the smiley happy lady and we waved at each other from either side of the road. Then onto the War Of The Worlds Lane for my final 3kms – it was sunny, warm and utterly empty, until I saw one lone man, loping down the road.

He wasn’t a runner but a cool walker with a very laid back loping walk. He was walking faster than I imagined and it took me a little while to overtake him – when I did he said Brava Signora – little does he know I am a would be pirate in disguise.

He was safe today, as I had another target in mind. And it was done -10.09kms – that got me to 1719.62kms run. Just over the planned 1718. Maybe I would have done better looking at 1719s activities on Google instead. We will never know…

Playlist

From my Weather Playlist

Chasing Cars – Snow Patrol

Ice Ice Baby – Vanilla Ice

Misty Blue – Dorothy Moore

It’s Raining Men – The Weather Girls

Sunshine of Your Love – Cream

Something In The Air – Thunderclap Newman

Sunny – Boney M

Ain’t No Sunshine – Lighthouse Family

Purple Rain – His Purple Highness

Downpour – Backstreet Boys

Sunshine On Leith – The Proclaimers

On The Road Again – Canned Heat

Baby It’s Cold Outside – Menzel and Bublé

Cold as Ice – Foreigner

Bridge Over Troubled Water – Stormzy and Artists for Grenfell

Summer Breeze – Isley Brothers

Cold – Stormzy

Sunshine On A Rainy Day – Galimar

Sunday Morning – Maroon 5

I Can’t Stand The Rain – Ann Peebles

Stats

Distance 10.09km

Time 1:07:59

Average Pace 6:44

Elevation Gain 51 metres

Alzheimer’s Challenge

Kms Run 1719.62

Kms To Run 298.38

 

16 Oct – The kNAFFTAs* are here

white clothes line trousers past
*Knickers and Foundation Fitness Training Awards – the ‘k’ is silent

 

In English we have a phrase ‘don’t get your knickers in a twist’ or a knot is also a variant on the adage. This came to mind during my run this morning. It occurred to me that whilst I had created a scoring method for my sports bras, I hadn’t done the same for the nether region’s needs. What’s good enough for upstairs is good enough for downstairs, so here we go.

Here is my indispensable guide to working out whether your running/sporting undergarments pass muster.

A  – Appearance

In relationships, for some of us, looks are all. Others prefer character or even a good sense of humour. How your underwear looks may just make the crucial difference between running and running scared.

Score yours as follows:

0= Who said knickers were necessary? I run commando.

1= I re-purposed granny’s bloomers/ grandad’s plus-fours, they are a bit bulky under the lycra

2= Other than the rotting elastic, they’re looking good for 10 years wear

3= So-so, I wouldn’t die of shame if my shorts fell down

4= Nearly new, neat and rather natty

5= The haute couture of knickers, I prefer to be seen in these rather than my running shorts

B for Bounce

For us runners some moving flesh can be problematical. Underwear providing a bit of support can be the difference between being able to sit comfortably post run and being forced to apply anaesthetic cream in places you rather wouldn’t.

Score yours as follows:

0 = I run commando, bounce hardens you up

1= OMG, there’s a flesh rollercoaster down/back there, it’s all unrestrained

2= I yelp occasionally when my parts get out of synch

3= An occasional hiccup, but otherwise it’s settled nicely

4= Firm without constriction

5= There ain’t nothing going on down there

C – Chafeability

The feel of your undergarment fabric can change your whole demeanour, for better or worse

Score yours as follows:

0= I’ve already told you, running commando makes me ‘meanour’

1= I think they call it glass paper at B&Q, this material takes no prisoners, I’m on my way to A&E

2= Hessian is not as eye-watering as you may think and runner’s lube helps

3=  I gasp occasionally in the shower – as a consequence my partner is somewhat suspicious

4= Seamless, wicking technology – need I say more?

5= My personal shopper sourced the most wonderful, hand woven Tibetan silk underwear. Please define chafe for me.

D for Dirt Management

Running underwear needs laundering, most of us can’t afford the time or have the inclination for special treatment

Score as follows:

0= Commando baby, nothing necessary

1= Handwoven Tibetan silk requires a Tibetan silk hand washing specialist, luckily I can afford one

2= Who doesn’t use a dry cleaner?

3= Hand washing preferred, with like minded clothing, we don’t like conditioner

4= Washing machine but please make it gentle with no tumble drying

5= Washing machine – any programme, these babies are indestructible

E for Expensively Branded

Running is supposed to be cheap, but as we know that’s not really true especially if you fall prey to ‘swoosh envy’, so how does your underwear size up on cost?

Score as follows:

0= I’ve told you so many times, I go commando, no cost impact for me, but my partner doesn’t like touching my running shorts

1= Handwoven Tibetan silk, doesn’t come cheap and my undies don’t either

2= Usain Bolt recommended these and he deserves the money

3= Goldilocks Porridge – just right

4= I’ve got money left over for lube

5= How cheap?!?, Better buy a multi-pack

F for Form

We’ve all fooled ourselves from time to time over the form of our clothing, for example ‘I did look good in the 80s’. Your choice of shape/type of underwear speaks volumes about you as a runner.

Score yours:

0= Runnng commando, my form is perfect and I won’t hear otherwise. I actually don’t hear otherwise as no-one will or does run with me

1 – I do everything in my boxers, although I concede they do look odd over my running shorts

2 – Going for a thong, who doesn’t like a cheesecutter?

3 – The old, grey faithful, no longer recognisable in form, colour or age. I can’t even be sure that they’re not my partner’s knickers

4 – My Bridget Jones Big Pants – my wife/husband says they suit me and provide a very useful tummy tuck service at the same time

5 –  Proper, pucker, perfect running knickers. No seams, wicking technology, no riding up with wear – heaven in a brief.

For scoring – anyone with a zero score – I think we all know how you run, more or less naked and most definitely alone. 😉

The higher the score the better the knicker. You can find the excel sheet here, to help you score your drawers

kNAFFTA2019

P.s. Run Done – same issues as yesterday – the fog meant Map My Run recorded me as doing 56kms today

Playlist

Dad Dancing Classics

Come On Eileen – Dexys

Money For Nothing – Dire Straits

Ballroom Blitz – Sweet

This Town Ain’t Big Enough For The Both Of Us – Sparks

Sit Down – James

Jump Around – House of Pain

Oops Up Side Your Head – The Gap Band

Bat Out Of Hell – Meatloaf

Rockin’ All Over The World – Status Quo

Papas Got A Brand New Pigbag – Pigbag

Born To Run – The Boss

Greased Lightning – John Travolta

Dreadlock Holiday – 10cc

Mr Blue Sky – ELO

I’m Too Sexy – Right Said Fred

Timewarp – The Rocky Horror Show Cast

Tubthumping – Chumbawumba

Pretty Vacant – Sex Pistols

Prince Charming – Adam and The Ants

Living On A Prayer – Bon Jovi

Bohemian Rhapsody – Queen

Sex On Fire – Kings of Leon

Stats

Distance 10.08km

Time 1:05:08

Average Pace 6:27

Elevation Gain – indeterminable

Alzheimer’s Challenge

Kms Done 1674.64

Kms To Run 343.36