Mar 17 – The Loneliness of the Non-Distance Runner

 

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With thanks to Mr Sillitoe for the inspiration for the post’s title

A recap

2018, let’s run 2018km to raise £2018 for Alzheimer’s Research – done, tick well done

2019, let’s fix the frozen shoulder and gippy hip, with a view to being able to learn to box this year – aha, a work in progress. And then go back to normal running about 1200/1500kms in a year. Oh and hopefully manage a half marathon sometime during the year.

January – physio started, doctor’s health check done – a few small issues highlighted:-

  • Kidney issuette
  • High cholesterol
  • Shoulder still dodgy, but being fixed
  • Hip being fixed, however it is resisting treatment
  • Migraines a go -go

February – mmm, things aren’t getting any better:-

Kidney infection, necessitating antibiotics for a week

Gastric type flu, which 4 weeks later is still hanging around

Shoulder, now close to being mobile – yippee

Hip, IT Band, Glutes  – all still problematic

I did however, Marie Kondo my running kit drawer, so it looks professional, even if I don’t.

March – 

Flu continues

Shoulder within touching distance of a fix

Hip – being very stubborn and I am banned from running

Upside, we are due back in Italy soon and I have my physio plan.

Downside, my physio plan involves weird crab like manoeuvres, involving me squeezing my buttocks imagining I’m holding a £20 note between them. Having never squeezed a £20 note (or any other denomination or currency) between my buttocks, this does involve a severe look of concentration, coupled with the hope that I don’t really look like a constipated crab.

Now I didn’t know that there is a YouTube character called the Constipated Crab, so here for your delectation is the Constipated Crab Video link. Any similarity between me and said crab is purely physiotherapical (I know it’s not a word!)

 

The main reason for posting is that if I keep doing the Physio and exercises, and if I write about those instead, it’ll keep me on the straight and narrow.

Wish me luck on the latest part of the physio treatment plan. Tomorrow morning – we do the stork, followed by the crab thing, followed by squatting and leg lifts, with my assorted coloured elastic bands. Think primary school bondage, and you’re not far off my current exercising look. I have a fear that after having broken the 2k km in a year, that I could end up redoing C25K again. My fingers are crossed  that me and Mr Smooth don’t actually have to start dating again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

15 Feb – Strike A Pose…

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From geek.com, where more Shrek delights await. Parental Advisory: this site contains images not suitable for children, and I’m not sure they’re any better for adults.

Another day passes, and yet another day without a run (sigh). The upside is though is that Mr JCR and I are in Arnhem for a Winter Wonderland and Fairytale birthday party.

The downside is that one of the friends of our friends is threatening to turn up as a naked Shrek. Green and with dangly bits, it doesn’t bear thinking about, especially for an outdoor barbecue in February. In case your imagination doesn’t stretch that far, here is a pic, so you can enjoy the same nightmare I did last night.

To the more serious bit about running, it is now just on five weeks without a run, and in that time five sets of physio. The good news is the pain is improving, the bad is that it’s not improving anywhere near quickly enough. But I have exercises to do and they seem to help. I am giving myself a mental limit to the end of February to start back running in earnest.

My running limit is 2km per run (as advised by my Physio) I must not run again until the aching subsides – presently that’s been five or six days, most of the pain is centred around the IT band, and it’s being very stubborn in attempts to sort it out.

The exercise regime includes squats, lunges and a crab type thing with buttock squeezes – and when I am being pummelled by the Physio, I more or less have to adopt the Shrek position above.

If I don’t start running soon my buttocks will also resemble Shrek’s. That is my update – an update where nothing is happening. Although I have a feeling that if a naked Shrek does appear on Saturday night, I’ll soon find my running capability comes back very quickly.

More next week, when Mert, Victor and the unnamed lady physio, will be doing their very best to get me moving again.

 

 

 

 

29 Jan – JCR Is On The Road Again

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Strictly speaking, this is not exactly true, but the Physio has confirmed I can try a little run, no more than 25% of my usual distance and I must rest for 24 hours minimum afterwards.

This coupled with Mr JCR acting as a muscly stretching person on my unwilling legs and an introductory course of Pilates, is supposedly going to get me back to normal. Hurrah. (I’m trying to forget the squats instructions…)

As to the dodgy shoulder, that’s a longer game, Mert and Victor and Raffaella are going to continue to see me weekly for at least a couple of months to come. As I don’t run with my shoulder, that’s a little less of an issue, although the injury is more severe, but it is going to curtail any thoughts of boxing for a while.

A little ray of sunshine pierced through the injury gloom, and the blooming flowers in the park on the way home, made me feel quite optimistic.

From a Couch to 5K member, to a 2000km runner, I am now back to doing just 2kms, but it’s 2kms more than I’ve been able to do for almost four weeks now.

If the Beast from the East is returning for me, I’m ready and waiting – trainers are on standby.

 

 

 

14 Jan – Hey Fatty Bum Bum

brown and white bear plush toy
This bear sums up my physical state…

As of today, I haven’t run for quite a while, which is not good. I can feel my waistline expanding each day of inactivity.

My list of ‘ailments’ include:-

  1. migraine (same old, same old)
  2. a dodgy hip that hurts permanently
  3. a kidney infection requiring antibiotics
  4. soon to be unfrozen shoulder (I hope)
  5. newly diagnosed very high cholesterol count

I have a feeling that my bod has decided to allow all the ailments in, now that the challenge has finished. Luckily, I do have a fix list

  1. New migraine treatment, which should prevent rather than cure them
  2. Physiotherapy at London Metropolitan with the two heavies Mut and Victor
  3. Antibiotics – 3 days down, 4 more to go
  4. See fix number two
  5. A promise to my GP to watch my diet and we re-test in a month

1-4 not really in my control, but number 5, I have a feeling the chocolate, cheese and rich food feasting over Christmas and New Year may have taken their toll, at least I’m hoping that’s the reason. Or maybe throughout the year my Kardashian kulo was growing due to dairy intake and not because of running muscle gain?

I really couldn’t face doing dry January, nor Veganuary, so am settling for reduced booze, chocolate, cheese, red meat, and doing meat free Mondays. I am now on Day 4 of the new regime, I hope to goodness this works!

Thursday we are meeting our friend Pete for a meal at Foxlow – the master of beef cookery in Clerkenwell. P just donated to my challenge, bringing my funds raised to just over £2,500 before tax relief, so I feel that a bit of indulgence won’t hurt, if it’s red meat just once in a week.

Any ideas for veggie recipes that are interesting, don’t involve hours worth of chopping and don’t rely on cheese or cream to make them tasty? On the banned list are the following:-

  1. Cream
  2. Butter
  3. Milk
  4. Eggs
  5. Cheese
  6. Yoghurt
  7. Red meat – beef, lamb, pork, prosciutto, bacon, sausages
  8. Anything yummy, such as cake, chocolate brownies, Portugese Custard Tarts

I found a glorious shepherd’s pie recipe, but it involved copious amounts of potatoes, butter and cheese. Back to the drawing board JCR. We actually ate lentil ragu and spaghetti tonight- I’m trying to convince myself it was yummy, but in truth, at best it was edible. If it was summer, then no problem, bring on the salads and loads of fish. But winter I crave something comforting and warming.

Ho hum, I think January will involve eating sandpaper, aggressive broccoli and lentils –  fingers crossed that this does the job and my GP doesn’t decide I need more drugs. I have this horror of having the daily pill list 😦

Any positive non cholesterol oriented vibes you can send, would be much appreciated.