Old Enough to Tie Your Laces Correctly?

I really thought I was, after a number of decades on this planet… I can recall clearly parents both telling and then showing me how to chase the lace through the loop.

Truth be known I can’t remember that many catastrophes in my life as a result of untied laces, or even incorrectly tied laces, but still a risk is a risk.

Fast forward decades later when I happened upon Ted Talks and like most people do, I decided that viewing the top 20 talks would be a good introduction to Ted. Who knew what I had been missing? In 2005 this Ted Talk, changed the face of human lace tying…. (actually I am certain it is only humans who tie laces)

How to Tie Your Shoe Laces Correctly…

Having never fallen over before as a result of incorrect shoe lace tying, I was sure my life would be transformed by a new safe, secure, non-slippy form of lace tying. Never again would I fear social ostracization over an unkempt, untied shoe lace. I have had 7 or 8 safe, secure years of good lace management. In all that time, I have been able to hold my own in polite society.

Then I started running and  to my horror found out that the eminent Ted can’t actually be trusted, it does not in fact represent the World’s best foolproof method of tying your laces. There are more and specific methods for tying your trainers. Slippy heel issues, wide forefeet or high insteps, this is the definitive guide:-

Tying Laces for Running

Now you know, different strokes for different folks. I just hope to goodness I now don’t fall over on a run….

17 September -Runnin’ just as fast as you can…

Except it’s really not true.A few days on the injury couch having impressed the Olympic diving judges with my tucked, pike dismount from the shower tray, no running at all in fact.

Saturday, I tried a jogette around the house – mmm back still very twingey, so I thought I should check out the advice again on what to do in case of injury and it turns out there’s a very useful mnemonic.

RICE = Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevation

Taking them one by one

Rest – we have 10 Londoners with us for Mr JCR’s cycling club twinning event, five of whom are staying at our house (from the day after I did my muscle pull until Monday evening – yesterday). That is the Rest element well and truly off the agenda.

Ice – it’s cooler here now and I am a lizard by temperature preference, so the thought of sellotaping a bag of frozen peas to my back seems very unappealing. Oh and the peas are already in use, as one of the cyclists did her knee in.  Ice quite clearly not happening.

Compression- not entirely sure how to compress a back, got some very interesting answers from Dr Google, all of which seemed to require me to perform positions only seen in gymnastic competitions and Ann Summers gear. Compression off the list then…

Elevation – now that seemed to involve taking my back off the ground, well it normally is off the ground, and a second Dr Google search seemed to involve trapezes.

Having decided the official RICE advice wasn’t for me, I created my own RICE.

R = Ra ra Rasputin, Lover of the Russian Queen – this song is particularly good for dancing with a host of 10 London cyclists and their Italian hosts. Truthfully not one twinge did I feel whilst dancing to this, well I did feel more than a twinge of embarrassment at dancing to it and knowing the words.

I = Inglesi and Italiani  insieme. Spending 6 hours on a Saturday night through to Sunday morning, dancing, laughing and drinking with a lovely bunch of people.  This seemed to be the perfect pick me up.

C = Cool (Daddy Cool) – Boney M’s classic hit, yet another reason to hit the dance-floor, throwing some shapes…, followed by a rather nifty rendition of YMCA and Barry White’s ‘You’re My First, My Last, My Everything”. I think you get the drift of the evening.

E = Early to Bed. 2am is early!

I do not think Sports Scientists will be adopting the JCR RICE method, but it worked for me.

Sunday, I went for a run/walk – thinking in the spirit of ingliano and making up words, it is a wun. An entirely new route, so I am sure you are all waiting in bated breath for the new street names… New route included barking beagle hill, laundry lane, road to nowhere and prune way. As is my wont, I messed up the technology again and at one stage did a rather superb sub 3minutes kilometre split. Mo Farah I’m after you!

All in all about a 9km outing and I reckon I ran about 6/7 kms, which means I can start running again, properly. Next outing maybe Wednesday afternoon…

Playlist

Disco 2000 – Pulp

Just Can’t Get Enough – Depeche Mode

Save a Prayer – Duran Duran

Rumour Has It – Adele

Scooby Snacks – Fun Lovin’ Criminals

Locomotion – OMD

Help Me Rhonda – Beach Boys

Hungry Heart – The Boss

Mercy – Duffy

Lose Yourself – Eminem

Crazy in Love – Beyonce

I Try – Macy Gray

Strong – London Grammar

See You – Depeche Mode

When Doves Cry – Prince and The Revolution

Cake By The Ocean – DNCE

Don’t Stop Til You Get Enough – Michael Jackson

Sign Your Name – Terence Trent D’Arby

People Are People – Depeche Mode

Upside Down – Paloma Faith

Na Na Na Na Naa – Kaiser Chiefs

I Won’t Let The Sun Go Down On Me – Nik Kershaw

China Girl – David Bowie

Andy, You’re a Star – The Killers

Is Vic There? – Department S

By The Way – Red Hot Chilis

Stats*

*To be taken with  a big pinch of salt only…..

Distance 8.25km (but Map My Run was stalled for at least 1km)

Time 1hr 23 mins (included 2 chats with friends….and yes I forgot to pause MMR)

Pace 10.03 mins/km

Best kilometre 2 mins 14 seconds….

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My cups runneth over… A to F Cup Challenge

After the recent A to E Cup Challenge, lots of C25K women suggested that a critical  part of bra evaluation had been missed off the highly scientific excel scoring method.

So, to redress the balance and to make sure all sports bras are properly scored, we have added a new category.

F for Fit

No, this doesn’t mean whether you can run a marathon or not. It asks the question does the bra actually fit you? Many of us complain, about the under or over boob bulge. Shoulder straps too short so you look as though you have no neck, or too long giving you boobs hanging around at waist level.

The  ‘fit’ scoring model is as follows:-

1 – Surgery is going to be costly, shoulders need to drop/raise/be removed. Rib cage in the wrong place.

2 – Who doesn’t like having 5 boobs, or alternatively just the mono boob?

3 – Okay if I lean like the Tower of Pisa, or don’t have to alter just one strap by 6 cm.

4 – No bulges, no gaps, no under boob, no chafing, no problems

5 – The Savile Row of bras, everything in place, regardless of running pace

The new xls spreadsheet will be loaded onto the A to E Cup Challenge.

Award winners and trophy to be loaded Sunday.

 

Take The A to E Sports Bra Challenge

Week 2 of my new found graddydom, as the rain splattered (hallelujah rain) I was thinking about running kit, as Mr JCR is a cyclist and he has oodles of stuff. What’s the minimum critical equipment you have to have to run?

First off proper fitting trainers – yup got them 2 years ago the last time I ran, so no problem there.

Decent sports socks so your tender feet don’t shred under the new regime. Yup got them too.

Tops and Bottoms – you don’t have to have the fancy stuff to start, but you develop a fondness for terms such as wicking.

And finally for us wimmin – Sports Bras. Now, yes I’ve got a rather motley collection after all these failed attempts at getting fit, but in fairness I don’t think I’ve got the right ones.

In a fake science sort of way I have created my own A2E Cup Sports Bra Challenge Table, where I give a score between 1-5 against five criteria. This is to see which, if any, of my bras pass muster. As befits a Bra Review, the scoring criteria are designated by cup size in ascending order, with a description of each score and its meaning to help you think about your fundamentals.

A Cup for Appearance

A surgical looking compression garment, is hardly likely to encourage you to run, but then we don’t want Ann Summers either

Score as follows:-

1= Fugly or Utterly Inappropriate

2= Ugly

3= Meh

4= Niice

5= I want to run with this on now and I could wear it out socially, surely

B Cup for Bounce

A sports bra is only any good if it controls the bounce. Bouncing can cause black eyes. Most of us need more support than Kate Moss, otherwise irreversible damage to your Cooper’s ligaments ensues.

Score as follows:

1= Whoa calm that bouncing down, there’s a roller coaster of flesh on the move

2= I wouldn’t want to be balancing anything on here, right now

3= Occasional Jiggle

4= Firm, But Fair

5= Solid, solid as a rock baby

C Cup for Cleanability

Is it easy to wash? Does it have to be hand washed in pure mountain dew by the light of the moon?

Score as follows:

1= Dry Clean only or Mountain Dew preferred

2=Needs its own detergent, washing bowl and private space on the washing line

3= Prefers a hand wash, but occasional visits to a machine with ordinary clothing tolerated

4= Washing machine is fine but bagged and with like-minded clothing

5= Just bung me in, I don’t care

D Cup for Dextrousness

Do you need someone to help you in it/out of it? Does it twang like a bungee when you try and roll it up/down when sweaty? Do you look like you are wearing a climber’s harness, with clasps, cleats and carabiners?

Score as follows:

1= Requires a lady’s maid or cabin crew, to get you in and 10 minutes free time

2= Good job in a previous life you were a contortionist

3= Bit of bending required, it counts as pre-run stretching

4= Just like a normal bra, hook from the back or I hook swoosh it to the front

5= Front loading bliss

E Cup for Expense

Running is supposed to be a cheap sport, so if it costs too much that’s not good, as it will put me off buying one.

Score as follows:

1=You’ve got to be joking, that’s a handbag, a pair of shoes and a bottle of vino

2= Gulp, would a years’ supply of surgical bandage be cheaper

3= Mmm okay, still leaves some cash for a sweatband

4= Bargain Basement – that’s the pub for lunch then

5= How cheap?!?, better buy 2

So here’s how mine stack up:-

Winner is Berlei Shock Absorber with 18/25

2nd is Sweaty Betty, although there is weird pouchy thing going on, that I’m really not sure about

My 2 Adidas and New Look bras are on the ‘to bin’ list as 60% at 15/25 isn’t a good enough score

So ladies over to you – how do yours score?

p.s. Just done my 3rd 5k run…

Yay